


kyusung | last time i ask you for a favor!

by plincess_cho (ai_hao)



Series: Fic Requests [36]
Category: Super Junior
Genre: Author: Ai, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-07
Updated: 2015-03-07
Packaged: 2018-03-16 17:10:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3496283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ai_hao/pseuds/plincess_cho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dialogue Prompt: "Last time I ask you for a favor!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	kyusung | last time i ask you for a favor!

Even though it was his fault, Kyuhyun still blamed the whole thing on Donghae. Mainly because  _everything_  was Donghae’s fault because he broke literally  _everything_  that he touched. Lightsticks, keyboards,  _everything_. Plus, Donghae was an easy target. He’d cry a little and do some aegyo and all would be forgiven. No harm, no foul.

But in reality, the Great Pet Debacle of 2015 was 100% Kyuhyun’s fault. You see, he had gotten a science kit for his birthday, purely as a joke, from Changmin. (“Happy birthday, nerd. Here’s a little motivation to become a supervillain,” the card read. His mother was  _not_  amused). At first he laughed it off, but when the internet went out again (seriously, who put the router in the kitchen anyways), he decided not to start his Starcraft campaign over and mess around with his science kit instead.

He combined a few different sets of chemicals, but none of them reacted at all. “It’s probably just colored water,” he decided.  _That’s why it was so cheap._  Changmin had neglected to scrape off the price tag on the back: 10,000 won. His most recently chemical mismatch was a gross dark green colored that vaguely reminded him of Yesung’s turtles.

Yesung’s turtles.

That he was supposed to feed and water while Yesung was away for the night.

Oops.

So being the good dongsaeng that he was, Kyuhyun restocked the turtles’ food and filled up their water bowls. But what he didn’t realize was that some of the chemicals that he’d dumped out into the sink had splashed into the surrounding clean bowls.

Oops.

Now that it was 4am, Kyuhyun decided it was time for bed and crawled under the covers to fall fast asleep.

*

The next morning, he awoke to a loud banging on his door. “KYUHYUN WAKE UP!” Eunhyuk yelled. 

Kyuhyun rolled over and pulled the pillow over his head. Eunhyuk tried the handle but it was locked (they all had learned their lesson after Donghae decided it was a good idea to take photos of Ryeowook sleeping naked… and then lose his phone on the metro). Eunhyuk jiggled the handle for another minute before all was silent. 

Then suddenly the door was open and Eunhyuk was on top of him, yelling in his ear.

"What the hell," Kyuhyun grumbled. "How did you get in?"

Eunhyuk held up a paperclip. “Picked the lock. Duh. Get up. There are voices coming from somewhere in the dorm but I can’t tell where.”

"Stop drinking," Kyuhyun replied and pushed him away.

"No I’m serious," Eunhyuk said. "And… they’re calling for you."

Kyuhyun got up with every intention of going back to sleep after proving that Eunhyuk was on some sort of drugs, but once he stepped into the main area of the dorm, he knew this would be a long day.

"Kyuhyunnnnnnnnn," the voices called.

"What the hell," Kyuhyun repeated.

"See? I told you."

They checked everywhere for a hidden recorder or a hidden camera. Kyuhyun belatedly realized that if they were on TV, he was in just his underwear. But then he reasoned to himself that they’d made a pact to never shoot in the dorm without telling the other members. “Heechul, where are you,” he growled.

He checked the area around the turtle cage when he heard, “We’re in here, idiot.”

It was the turtles.

Kyuhyun scrambled backwards and fell on his butt. “Hyuk… it’s… the turtles…”

"Of course it’s the turtles," the bigger one (Ddangkkoming) said. "Whatever you put in our water bowls last night gave us the ability to speak."

"What did you do to them?" Eunhyuk asked in horror.

"Nothing! It was just water… and… science…"

"More like dumb," the smaller one, Ddangkomaeng, shot back. "When is Jongwoon coming back?"

"Uhh…"

Of course, the door opened right then, letting in a somewhat sleepy Yesung. “How are my kids today?” he asked, addressing the turtles and completely ignoring his dongsaengs.

"Able to speak thanks to your dimwit dongsaeng," Ddangkkoming replied calmly. Yesung almost passed out.

*

As if the turtles talking wasn’t bad enough, it turned out that somehow, the other SJ pets had been affected. Eunhyuk had fed Choco from one of the bowls in the sink and Bugsy had contracted it somehow. They were still unclear on that. Leeteuk called for a meeting on the upper floor (the one that wasn’t contaminated by anything sciencey, just Heechul’s gross self) and they all convened there with the talking animals.

"Can Heebum talk?" Eunhyuk asked Heechul. The cat simply sat on Heechul’s legs and gave Eunhyuk a murderous glare. So nothing out of the ordinary.

"Okay so to start this off, what the hell," Leeteuk said.

"Blame Kyuhyun," Ddangkomaeng said. "If he had fed us at a normal time with normal water, we wouldn’t be having this problem."

"You didn’t feed them properly?" Yesung shrieked. "That’s the last time I ask you for a favor."

"Good," Kyuhyun shot back. He didn’t like doing chores anyways.

"I think we have a problem," Kangin said. "These animals have seen a lot. What if they start letting out our secrets?"

"How do we fix this?" Ryeowook asked. "Your floor is already noisy enough."

"Fix?" Choco asked. "I don’t want to fix it! I like talking!" she nestled further into Eunhyuk’s lap and looked up at him with big shining eyes. "Just like I like Hyukjae oppa. Hyukjae oppa is my favorite. He’s so nice and handsome and caring and wonderful and—"

"Oh my god, someone tell that dog to shut up," Heebum interrupted, standing up from Heechul’s lap. He climbed over Heechul, placing one paw directly on Heechul’s crotch. "Yaaa!" Heechul protested. Heebum just glared at him.

"Ooh talking cat!" Donghae exclaimed, reaching out for the cat.

"Get your child hands off of me, puppy," Heebum said. Donghae moved his hands away. 

"We definitely have a problem," Leeteuk said. Everyone else just groaned.

*

At first, the animals being able to talk was cool. As if he didn’t love Choco already, once she started going on and on about how cool he was, Eunhyuk fell in love with her even more. Yesung tried to talk with his turtles more (“When I asked where we should send Ddangkkoma, why didn’t you guys reply?”), but they weren’t as nice.

"If you were lonely, why didn’t you get a puppy? Why did you get turtles?" Ddangkkoming asked.

"Shut up, I like him," Ddangkkomaeng replied.

Bugsy was even derpier than they had imagined. He didn’t so much speak as just make generic “logrglsldfoowe” noises in Siwon’s general direction. Siwon tried to communicate with him, but as before, they could only communicate with their eyes.

Until Heechul said something about Bugsy being ugly. Then Bugsy turned on Heechul and would’ve lunged if Siwon hadn’t grabbed him.

"You’re one to talk," Heebum said, balancing on the back of the sofa. "That haircut is hideous. Why don’t you listen to Gunhee?"

"I hate this cat."

"This cat hates you."

"Ya!" Heechul lunged at Heebum but the cat avoided him. "What did I ever do to you?"

"What  _didn’t_  you do?” Heebum replied. “You dressed me up in those awful outfits and made me attack your members and pimped me out to get more likes on SNS. Not to mention how you take up the entire bed and keep buying more cats. Are you trying to be more of an old cat lady than you already are?”

"I mean… he’s not lying," Kangin supplied helpfully. Heechul glared at him.

"You should treat me better. You should treat your members better. And Gunhee. And get rid of all this Frozen crap. You’re a 32-year-old man not a 12-year-old girl," Heebum continued. "And stop being such a bitch when Han Geng comes over. Of course his Korean sucks but your Chinese isn’t much better." Heebum hops off the sofa. "You know, I have a lot of power like this. I’m sure there are plenty of fangirls who want to hear all of Kim Heechul’s secrets."

"Somebody make it stop!" Heechul whined.

Heebum jumped into Kyuhyun’s lap. Kyuhyun eyed the cat warily: he never cared much for pets especially ones that could talk. “You’re an idiot, but you’re not entirely stupid. Make some more of that serum and send it to Tiger. He and I need to have a long chat.”

"Your cat is friends with a tiger?" Eunhyuk asked.

"Tiger.  _Laohu_. As in Han Geng’s cat,” Heebum replied.

"I made it on accident!" Kyuhyun said. "I can’t recreate it."

"Fine, then I’ll just go spill all of your precious secrets until you can," Heebum replied. He jumped to the floor and headed for the door.

There was a mad scramble to get to the cat. “Don’t let him escape!” Heechul screeched. “I’ll do anything! Please don’t do this!”

Somebody grabbed his shoulder and held him back. “Let me go!” Heechul yelled. “He’s going to tell the whole world all of my secrets!”

*

"Heechul… Heechul… wake up!"

Suddenly, Heechul is back in the world of the living with Kyuhyun and Yesung staring straight at him.

"You!" Heechul lunges at Kyuhyun. Thankfully, Yesung jumps between them. 

"Who’s trying to escape?"  he asks.

"Heebum! He can talk and he’s going to tell the world all of my secrets unless Kyuhyun makes the talking animal formula to send to Han Geng."

"Uhm, what the hell," Kyuhyun says. "Heebum is a cat. Cats can’t talk."

On cue, a furry body emerges from underneath the blankets and looks up at him with those large gray eyes. He meows at Heechul and then jumps down to find some food.

"I think you drank too much last night," Kyuhyun informs him. "Either that or you’ve already lost your mind and need to be sent to the old folks’ home."

Heechul lunges at him again.

* 

Later, Heechul tells the members his dream just to make sure it wasn’t real. After they all have a good laugh, they all go back to their individual rooms for the night. Except for Yesung. He flops down on the floor next to the turtle cage and peers intently at Ddakkoming and Ddangkkomaeng. 

"But what if you could talk…"


End file.
